Call Sign May 1999

OBITUARY - MICHAEL FOX

1933 - 1999

The Company of Hackney Carriage Drivers were saddened and shocked by the untimely death of their Past Master, Michael Fox. He suffered a severe heart attack on Tuesday 23rd March and tragically died three days later.
   Michael was forever full of life, invariably laughing and joking, but always eloquent in his manner. He was a founder member of the Fellowship of Hackney Carriage Drivers - as it was then in 1990. He became the Master in 1994 at a time when the trade were celebrating 300 years of licensing. Since then, he had taken an active part in the Company’s elevation within the City. At the age of 65, he was just beginning to take life a little easier.
   During the six-day war in Israel, Michael’s cab driving skills came to the fore when he was a tank driver in the army where he attained the rank of Sergeant. Unfortunately, he was demobbed after falling down a trench and breaking his leg. He then became part of an Anglo-Israeli trade delegation - which is where he learnt his diplomatic skills.
   His charm and ability to communicate with people at all levels was how we will always remember him. Who could know that when we sat at the dinner with him on that Monday night aboard the H.Q.S. Wellington, that he would be gone from our lives so suddenly. His funeral took place in Israel on Monday 29th March.
   The Company, along with his friends, wish his wife and sons sincere condolences on their loss and we mourn the passing of a true gentleman.

Ken Crawford (B40)

THE UNIVERSITY OF LIFE
OR HOW TO GET ON THE NERVES OF YOUR CAB DRIVER ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD…
Never suggest a route until almost at the end of the journey and then say to driver: "It doesn’t usually cost as much as that." He’ll then reply with: "Why didn’t you ask me to go the way you prefer." To which you retort sharply: "Well, you’re the taxi driver, you should know." Don’t tip… Always offer a Ł20 note for the shortest journey, even though you have smaller notes on you. When possible, do this at traffic lights or in a very narrow street eg outside Ronnie Scott’s Jazz Club so as to cause an immediate trail-back with much shouting and hooting. Don’t tip… To show your driver just exactly who is in charge, wait until you are at the set-down point before attempting to get your money out thereby wasting the driver’s time. After all, he can always work an extra hour! If travelling with a group in a taxi and intend sharing the fare, do not organise the fare-share until you are at the set-down point. Then you can also ask the driver if he	has change of Ł5 so that you can divide the fare more equally. You could also sort out who is going to pay for the first drink in the pub at the same time. This normally irritates the driver no end and can provide some on-the-spot entertainment. Definitely no tip, as giving a gratuity could alter the share-out. You can use a cab trip to clean out your pockets, briefcase or handbag. Most things can be thrown on the floor but tissues should be stuffed into the ashtray - preferably on top of the chewing gum. En-route, always expect the driver to know every football / cricket score in addition to informing you as to "how much an average taxi driver earns in a day." If he is non-committal as to how much that is, then you can probably tell him basing the assumption on the current meter reading. Appear to disbelieve his answer, as this always irritates them and can provide some additional fun. Should he ask YOU as to how much you earn, tell him that it really is none of his business and definitely don’t tip…	Try not to give the driver any clue as to the type of establishment you are going to, just give the bare address such as 192 Upper Ground or 38 London Wall. This is particularly effective in one-way streets because it keeps the driver guessing as to how best to approach the point. If he does it wrong, insist that he knocks some money off the fare or you will report him to the Public Carriage Office. Naturally, don’t tip… Always tell the driver that you are in a hurry and give him a slightly difficult deadline such as Canary Wharf to Shepherds Bush on a wet Friday evening in fifteen minutes! Whichever route he takes, complain throughout the whole journey that he should have gone another way. On arrival, ask the driver how much he is going to charge for that awful trip. Definitely no tip. Tell your driver that you know all cabbies are ‘right-wing’ know-alls! If the driver then asks how you arrived at this simplistic conclusion, tell him that it is a well known fact and don’t tip him - to show who’s boss…! Chris Hanrahan (B47)

THE UNIVERSITY OF LIFE